The Calling on My Heart
By Ashton Mattingly, America World Adoptive Mom
The summer before my sophomore year of college, I was sitting in a church pew next to my mother, listening to a group of my peers share their experience of a mission trip the winter before. They were raising money to go back at the end of the year.
My mom leaned over to me and whispered in my ear, “Would you like to go?”
My view of India was truly inspired by the magical representation of it in the movie A Little Princess. My mind was flooded with images of elephants and tigers.
I said, “Can I really?”
And that was it. My life would forever be changed.
While I had traveled to several countries by this point, I had never ventured past the luxuries of Western Europe. Having been afforded many luxuries in my life, I became hesitant about the journey ahead with the mention of hostiles, bucket baths, and the many critters we could encounter. I remember calling my mother from the airport before boarding the plane. I was overcome with fear and anxiety. All these years later, I am so grateful I didn’t let worry about the unknown and unfamiliar stop me from boarding that flight. I can still smell the distinct aroma of the air in Delhi the first time stepping off the plane and feel the heat and smog. The rest of my life was just about to begin.
Falling in Love with India
Immediately, I fell in love with India. I loved the people, the colors, the flavors. India was something special of which I couldn’t get enough. Mostly, I loved the mission. On this trip, we had the honor of spending our days loving on precious souls in a children’s home. I got to hear their stories of how they came to be in these circumstances, and my heart began to break. It was the first, real time that I could feel the true meaning of “God, break our hearts for what breaks yours,” and my goodness, was my heart broken. It was during my time with these precious girls who deserved their own families that I knew one day I would adopt a little girl from India. The next December, I would return to the orphanage with the same mission, and the desire God placed in my heart would only grow.
Throughout the next few years, I studied in Egypt and Ghana. I joined the Peace Corps in Mali. I traveled through West Africa, Central and South America, South East Asia, etc. I saw poverty and need beyond belief on every continent. While my heart would continue to ache for causes all throughout the globe, my calling to adopt a little girl from India never wavered. Not once. It would only grow and grow. At times, it was more than I could bear.
God’s Perfect Timing
During all of this, I got married. I actually got married quite young, at 22. When we married in 2012, my husband was aware of the way that I wanted to start our family. While he did agree, this was definitely a calling on my heart and not his. Over the years he would share with me his reservations and concerns. The pull in my heart that I had was all-consuming. I stayed vigilant, saved money, and prayed. I prayed for God to put this on my husband’s heart. Many nights I would pray that God put it on his heart or please take it off of mine. And then, a miracle happened. Towards the end of 2019, my husband came to me and said he was ready and would like to start the process at the end of 2020. God was working in him, with the perfect timing, for the exact child He had chosen for us. At this point, our daughter was not even born yet. But she would be soon.
In 2020, we worked to get our ducks in a row, hoping to expedite the expected two-year process. I quickly learned that the process is what it is, and there is no magic button for expedition. It is all God’s timing.
Adopting Hazel
Getting through the process was nothing short of an emotional roller coaster. The highs of matching with our precious daughter, receiving her updates of progress, surprise Facetime calls, and witnessing miracles along the way would get us through the lowest moments of our lives. Knowing your child is in an orphanage across the globe, and there is no way of being with her, is agonizing, but obviously possible and so worth it. We survived our full two-year wait with a great support system, a whole lot of Jesus, a lot of tears, and a good agency.
During the two-year process (we filed in November 2020 and picked her up in November 2022), we battled with unexpected delays, health concerns, and a lot of worry. Getting through the process was the hardest thing we’ve ever experienced. I can also say it was the closest we’ve ever been to God. Being completely out of control of what is happening each step of the journey, while half of your heart is thousands of miles away, can feel unbearable at times, but each time I felt I would break, God would send us the most incredible sign. I’m so grateful for America World and their reputation in India, as well as their dedication to get children in families where they belong. They got us through the process and literally held our hands until the moment we picked up our daughter from her orphanage.
Life with Hazel has been nothing but pure joy and bliss. She is the most gentle, playful, affectionate, joyful, darling girl.
She has changed our lives in only the best ways and adds so much love to our home. We are so fortunate to be her parents, and it is our greatest honor to raise her.
What a beautiful story! We are so grateful to Ashton for sharing her heart, and we are honored to be a part of uniting Hazel with Ashton and Jared!
Did you know? Our biggest adoption program is currently in India, Hazel’s country of birth. If you feel like God might be calling YOU to adopt from this beautiful place, visit our India program page to learn more or our Learn About Adoption page to take a first step. We are excited to find out what God might have planned for your family!